Frank Chiapperino » friendship

Busy Does Not Equal Meaningful

frank — Wed, 26 Jan 2011 05:31:53 +0000

This term crowded loneliness has come up in our church because of a study we started called Making Room for Life by Randy Frazee. When you think of loneliness what kind of person comes to mind? Perhaps someone who can’t leave their home due to illness? Or maybe someone in a nursing home? When I was a kid in church growing up we called folks in this situation “shut ins.” Often one of the trustees or board members were assigned to take them communion and pray with them each week and I remember hearing of them often in prayer requests.

However, most of us would say, “That’s not my life! I’m constantly on the go! I go to work early, stay at work late, bring work home, rush the kids to school, athletics, piano lessons, and other activities every day, along with trying to maintain a few friendships, hit the gym, and actually try to keep my marriage going oh and you cant forget your family – parents, brothers, sisters and in laws are important too. Plus I get to bed late and wake up early every day to make it all happen.”

I’m going to let you in on a secret. Being busy does not lead to fulfillment. Let me ask you something… If I was to ask you to list your fondest memories, what would they be?

Here are some of mine:

Family dinners
Family reunions
Church activities
Vacations with friends
Road trips with my wife
Personal spiritual retreat

You know what all but one of those things have in common? Meaningful experiences with other human beings. For most of us in our daily grind of living – BUSY DOST NOT EQUAL MEANINGFUL. That is a phrase that’s been sticking in my head the last few days. It reminds me of Romans 8:5-6

Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.

Hopefully you are finding peace in your life this week as you pursue a more simplified, Christ centered living. Living the kind of life that is ready to trade in chaos for connectedness. That is a major change that I hope to make in my life for 2011 and I don’t think it will be all that easy to learn, but I’m going to try.

Miracles Still Happen

frank — Fri, 16 May 2008 11:00:00 +0000

It amazes me what God uses to help people. Sometimes technology, sometimes medicine, sometimes other people. My friend Lindsay Spengler recently experienced something miraculous. After being stuck in bed for about 5-6 years she is now out and about and getting her life back. CBS news recently interviewed her about her recovery.

Click here to watch the video.

Matt Silver Farewell Video

frank — Fri, 09 May 2008 00:03:00 +0000

For those of you who didn’t make it to our farewell party for Matt and Carrie Silver a couple of weeks ago, below is a video of some of Matt’s many humorous moments here at CCV.

What If You Found $14,000?

frank — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 02:12:00 +0000

My buddy Tom found a bag on the side of the highway with $14,000.00 in it! Check out what happened as reported by Channel 6 ABC: click here to see the video

Confrontation

frank — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 22:01:00 +0000

I have been thinking a lot about confrontation lately. I spoke about it in a recent sermon, given counsel to a few leaders and volunteers, and wrote about it in a recent post (here). David Foster, author and pastor, recently posted 10 Signs It’s Time To Confront:

1. It’s time to confront when things aren’t working out even after you’ve given them sufficient time to do so.
2. When you’re avoiding each other.
3. When your silence is more about fear than the truth.
4. When allowing the contact to go on is hurting the other person.
5. When the contact is hurting other people.
6. When you see there is still time to redeem the relationship, the job, the person, or the potential future.
7. When you’re responsible for the health and well-being of the people involved in the situation. You have the power to do something, therefore you have the obligation.
8. When you’re able to separate the behavior from the person. You love the person always, even though you can’t support the behavior.
9. When your integrity and reputation as a friend, manager, leader, or business owner is on the line, it’s time to confront.
10. When you understand that sometimes love must be tough if it’s truly love. Love that is based on a lie is indulgence. Love that is based on truth and applied with mercy and grace is truly a gift from God.

Confrontation can be such a good thing when done the right way. It presents a real growth opportunity for us and the other person.

Privileged

frank — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0000

If you arrive a church early on Sundays, many of our services start with a countdown video that we call the 5 minute window. A few minutes into the video below you will see a college student named Alex (when he was baptized). He was one of the founding members of the youth ministry that I helped start here at CCV. It was a great experience and I feel so privileged to be able to watch him grow into a young man that leads a small group, helps with student ministry, and plays guitar in our band on Sunday morning. I thank God for opportunities to know guys like Alex and to witness life change happen right before my eyes. Plus, if you take the time to watch the below video you get to see me when I had hair!

My Friend Lindsay – Please Pray

frank — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 04:27:00 +0000

I have written here about my friend Lindsay Spengler in the past. Her spiritual maturity and strength is quite remarkable. The picture on the left is of her standing next to her Inspiration Wall in Mexico at the beginning of her recovery after being in bed for 5 years. She has been battling RSD (a condition that makes her skin feel like it is burning) since she was 16 and I have been privileged to be her friend as she has begun to recover through some breakthrough treatments she has received.

However, while visiting a doctor in Florida, Lindsay has picked up a severe blood infection and is in the ICU. Infections like this are extreme for her and can cause some serious problems with her health. Please keep her in your prayers.

Click here to read Lindsay’s online journal.

My Friend Andy and Motives

frank — Sat, 22 Sep 2007 13:07:00 +0000

My friend Andy Raatz and his family are missionaries in Moldova. I was a volunteer for him when he was a youth pastor during my time in the Air Force. He and his wife were a great example of Christian marriage to Shelli and I when we were dating. Now it is hard to believe that Andy, his wife Nancy, and their kids are on the other side of the world doing God’s work.

On his blog Andy recently wrote on the topic of Vision and I thought I would share it with you:

Why do we do what we do?
I don’t mean that in a simple rhetorical way, but a serious question. What are our motivations? What are the reasons we live and work and minister?

I have been asking myself those questions lately. I have seen many BAD motivations in other leaders. One man was motivated by his need for significance. He needed success and recognition like food and water (or so he thought). He wasn’t happy if another way praised. In fact, without his position of leadership, I truly believe he would have been lost.

I know of another person that was motivated by power and control. He would position himself continually to retain control over others, both through organization and manipulation. I’ve known many people motivated by severe self-interest. Self-interest isn’t bad, but when people are always thinking of one more dollar, one more note of self-recognition, one more feather in their cap.

What are my motivations? Am I out to prove something? Do I need some person’s thanks? Am I trying to “succeed” for the sake of success? Do I give money so Moldovans will like me? Do I write stories so people will say “Andy is a great missionary?”

I hope I can answer all those questions with a negative, but I have decided to ask myself those deep hard questions over and over again. I want to keep the fire on my motivations, so they are aligned with God’s motivations. I want my motivations to be:

I serve, because I love the serve.
I minister, without thinking of the need to hear “thanks.”
I give, without anyone needing to know. I share, wanting only God to get the glory.
I live, full of the joy of Christ and His peace.

What motivates you?

Lindsay Made It To Mexico

frank — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 01:22:00 +0000

Those of you who followed my last post about Linsay Spengler should know she made it to Mexico safely. Her dad, Mike, let me know it was a rough trip but she made it. Keep her in your prayers as she is going to be placed in a coma on Sunday. Fox 29 News in Philadelphia recently did a story on her departure. You can view it here…

http://www.myfoxphilly.com/myfox/MyFox/pages/sidebar_video.jsp?contentId=4143600&version=1&locale=EN-US

Does God Ever Use You?

frank — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 22:30:00 +0000

Something kind of cool happened to me this morning. I had a breakfast meeting with an old friend of mine from college. He was actually the RA for the married housing at Valley Forge Christian College (where I finished my ministry degree).

During our breakfast we caught up on life. We hadn’t spoken for about 6-8 months. The cool part of our conversation was when he shared that he thought God was using me, the last time we spoke, to tell him something.

It was another morning over breakfast and he was telling me how he was unhappy with his current job. My friend had quit pursuing his education and went into facilities management because he was good at it and it was an easy way for him to make a living. He really is talented at fixing things. I will never forget what he told me once, “Frank, necessity is not the mother of invention, poverty is the real mother of invention. Now that you are back in college and hanging around me you will learn this stuff!”

He was right, hanging around him I got to see the guy work in every trade from plumbing to auto mechanics. But I never thought my friend’s real talent was in fixing things. His talent is in fixing people. Connecting people to their spiritual self and helping then grow closer to God. When we met 8 months ago I shared with him that I thought he was in the wrong career field and that he should seek to get more involved in his church and pursue a job there as the church grows.

This morning he told me how that conversation was the beginning of a series of events (which I won’t go into detail) that led him to changing careers and going back into ministry.

It is so rewarding when God shows you that he is using you isn’t it? I am thankful for the many friends in my life that God has used to speak to me and I am equally thankful when God uses me to speak to them.